Fear of Another Fire

 

Today while we were cleaning up, the vacuum started smoking…

 

We were all right in the room – Jason and me and a bunch of the kids.  I’d told J it wasn’t working right and so he had looked at it and was watching and listening to it as Marrissa was vacuuming the living room.  Smoke everywhere!  And STINK!  WOW!  J figures the belt is stuck and he’ll look at it again.  Nothing major; we unplugged it right away and got it outside so it could stink out there!

 

Tonight at bedtime I had three kids who were scared to go to sleep.  Matthias, who normally just lays down, takes his bottle and goes to sleep, had a really hard time settling down, even though he’d begged to be put into his bed.  Cora read stories to Marrissa and Rayna.  So sweet, but when that was done, the two of them came out of their room in tears.  Terrified!

 

Right away, I figured I knew what the cause was.  I thought, if I plug the night light in they’d be better;  a little more light.  That made it worse!  It might start a fire, they said.  I told them that it was safe, that Daddy wouldn’t have bought it if he didn’t think it was safe to have in the house.  With the night light in, and Peace & Calming Essential Oil Blend on their feet and necks, I settled them back into bed.

 

I stayed with them a bit and we talked.  We talked about how we all got out safe before.  We talked about all the doors in this house where we live now.  Marrissa was worried about being able to get Rayna out of the room if she was asleep.  I said, “Do you know how to scream? Do you know how to shake her?”  They both laughed.  I said that I slept right across the hall and could get to them in time if there was a fire.  I reminded Marrissa how brave she was in our old house when she had to run by the flames to tell me about the fire.  I told her that I knew she’d be that brave again, if needed!  We talked about how if they woke and were scared they could come sleep next to my bed.  I reminded them that Daddy had put new smoke detectors in the house so those would wake us up in time to get to safety.  They seem to have settled into sleep now.

 

School tomorrow is going to be drawing escape plans.  And I might see if the chief can come have a look at them and just chat with them again sometime this week.  Even though Jason’s a fire fighter and knows all about that, sometimes it’s important to have someone else, someone important, to come and talk to them, too.  The chief and his wife are special people that love kids and support family.  They have a special place in their hearts for their fire fighter’s kids.

 

I know we have a long road ahead of us.  It’s not just about the stuff that we lost; it’s not just about the re-building of our home.  There are some real fears and concerns in the hearts and minds of each of my children.  All of them are reacting differently to this major experience!  Kristyn cries almost instantly when something doesn’t go her way.  Cora is almost overly helpful!  Marrissa seems normal, most of the time but is protective and organizing.  Wyatt is moody and loud!  Rayna needs a lot more sleep these days.  Matthias just needs his momma, a lot.  We are remaining open and honest and we talk about the fire a lot, almost whenever they want.  We’ve made sure that each child had possessions that are only for them, and not shared with a sibling.  We have allowed them their own space.  We’ve slacked on chores to give them time to regroup.  Sit-down school has not been required to this point (but there are books on the way).

 

It’s been 4 weeks tomorrow since the terrifying night of our house fire.  I am amazed at how far we’ve come already.  Life is getting back to routine.  We have the things we need to live day to day.  I guess those are kinda the easy things, right?  It’s the hard stuff, like what happened tonight, the fears and the grief, that is going to take the time.  Well, that and the rebuilding.

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,