Last week I posted about Colossians 3:18. This week I want to relate to you a wake up call I had in regards to verse 19, but the words there specifically.
19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.
(Colossians 3:19, New King James Version)
When speaking to our congregation about this verse, our pastor stated that the men should not be sitting too comfortably (after just hearing about women being submissive to their husbands) because there are more places in the Bible that God speaks to men about their leadership roles in the home and in the church than He does to women about their roles. The role that men are God-ordained to fill is a HUGE job and one that needs to be taken very seriously.
I have been so focused on the few verses directed at how women are supposed to act and do and be. Now, this isn’t necessarily bad or wrong, but I have lost my balance. For sure, I need to know my roles and responsibilities; I don’t deny that. I am glad that I have spent so much time studying these passages and reading books written by knowledgeable men and women. I don’t plan on stopping either (though my intensity may be less). I want to be the best wife and mother that I can be, that God wants me to be.
However, I had gotten to the point where I believed (or appeared to believe) that the woman is the cause for every issue in a marriage. I was coming to believe that if I just did this or did that that I could fix my marriage. You know what I realized, I can’t! I can help make things better by fulfilling my role (which is why I want to continue to study) but I can’t do it all. J needs to learn about and do the things God wants him to do.
Our men need to be re-educated to become the men that God really wants them to be. They need to re-learn to be the leaders in our churches and in our homes. I am a firm believer that feminism has feminized our men and changed them into people that we don’t really like. That being said, I do see a shift happening. We are blessed in our church to have strong men and to be raising some strong men. I see men desiring to change, to take back their man-hood. And I LOVE to see that.
I an struggling now with wanting to learn about what God says about men and their leadership. I’m not sure I should, because I fear that I will take that knowledge and “beat” my husband (and other men) with it. And, as Kathryn said to me, “That would not be very submissive or obedient.” I guess my job is to pray and let God continue to work in the lives of the men around me.
I’m just glad that I came to the realization that I was obsessed with the role of women.
Two words come to mind now:
Relax
Balance
Striving to learn and live God's purposes,
2 comments:
Interesting LaDonna!
Oh you are very wise LaDonna!! I seriously recommend NOT learning much about the man's role simply because for me, it caused huge amounts of discontent etc., I let the enemy speak to me about all the ways my husband wasn't fulfilling HIS roles and then get slack in my own role as a way to rebel against him...oh I'm so immature..lol Just being honest though..lol I think it would be different if you and J were studying men and women's roles together, but it *could* be a foothold for the enemy if you just learn about the man's role...you know? Hugs, it's so easy to get caught up in things, eh?
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