Our Homebirths - past and upcoming

Almost right from DAY 1 (meaning from before I knew I was pregnant with baby #1) DH wanted us to have homebirths.  He says that hospitals are for the very sick, not for healthy women giving birth to healthy babies.  I wasn't so sure, so when we first got pregnant with K, we did try a doctor.  A female doctor, because DH didn't want another man around that area of me.  Well, our first visit did not go well.  The doctor treated J like crap!  We did make the second appointment but never went to it.  We immediately started the search for a midwife.

This dear dear lady  has been our midwife now for almost 9 years (with a lapse of about a year when we lived in another province).  She has seen us at our worst; she has laughed with us and cried (sobbed) with us.  We don't want anyone else to attend our births.  If I can't have her, I would rather go it alone.

We got pregnant again very quickly after K; she was only 3 months old.  Our little C was breech though and so we had to transfer care to a hospital and a doctor.  C came into this world via c-section.  Even this very very experienced doctor was not going to risk a double-footling breech vaginal delivery.

Sometime later, I became pregnant with our boy Harvey.  He was a homebirth, with our midwife in attendance.  His labor was very long (for me) and looking back there may have been signs that none of us saw.  Harvey lived for 12 days.  Our midwife and her husband were a great support for us through this very tough time.

We moved a few months after Harvey's death to be closer to my husbands family.  Upon arriving we started searching for a midwifery service that would take us on as I was now pregnant with M.  Our little M was born in hospital with a couple of midwives and a  midwifery student in attendance.  We were treated very well by that group of midwives and would have preferred to deliver at home, but our hospital experience was good.

We moved back to Alberta the following winter when M was about 8 months old.  When I became pregnant with Mr. W we again contacted "our" midwife (cuz she's all ours and no one elses, right?).  She was more than happy to add us back into her practice.  Unfortunately when W decided to finally arrive (a full two weeks "late") he came very quickly and our midwife was not in attendance due to stormy January weather!  She arrived around a half an hour after and checked us all out and got us comfortable.  She was sad to have missed the delivery and I was sad she had too.

It wasn't much more than a year later when I called to ask her to do the prenatal for R's pregnancy.  Baby R also arrived before our midwife could get here as well.  Again, it was winter and the roads were icy.  When I called her to get her on her way, I thought she had a lot of time.  Well, Baby R came quicker than anyone expected and J and I were on our own again.  Our midwife arrived not long after (nor more than 20 min) to help get us settled and checked everyone out.

I have been blessed to be able to have a HUGE say in my birthing experiences.  I have almost always been able to birth at home, which is now my first choice.  I am now 21 weeks pregnant with our 7th baby.  "Our" midwife is once again involved but up until today we were unsure how much she was really going to be able to be involved.

The government health care has taken over the paying of the midwives which is great for low income families and in tough economic times.  However, with this financial help comes some not so helpful regulations.  I feel that many of my decisions in my deliveries are no longer mine.  There are more hoops to jump through and more regulations for us all to follow.  Midwifery in Alberta is changing, and not for the better, in my opinion.  Some look at it as having more options, but living in the "boonies" like I do, actually makes it tougher.  If I want a midwife, I have to go to her (generally) because they do not travel this far from where most of their clients live.  That limits my birthing options to hospital or birthing center, in most cases.

However, I have hope and am continuing to pray that this is not going to be the situation for us.  In speaking with my midwife this afternoon, I was told (but not promised) that there is a possibility of being able to deliver at home.  One of the regulations is that there must be two midwives present at the birth.  While my midwife is willing to travel to me, she was having difficulty finding a second midwife to travel with her.  In expanding her own practice, this may have changed!  I am waiting (impatiently) for the decision of the second midwife as to whether or not she will travel, so I can deliver at home!

Pray with me!

You should have heard  my dh's voice and response when I told him.  He doesn't get excited about much, but he was excited about this!  I am doing the happy dance about this situation.

 I have hope!

Hebrews 11:1 (NIV)
     Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Our Baby Arrived Early!!!

Rayna Adeline Harris
9lbs 4oz 19.5in

EDD: November 1, 2008
DOB: October 27, 2008

For about a week prior to her birth I had been having crampy, practice labor – an hour here and there, so when I woke Sunday, October 26th with contractions about 20 minutes apart I was not concerned. I got everyone dressed and we went to church. Through the service and visiting afterward, my contractions spread out to 40 minutes and petered out to nothing through the afternoon. Around 4:30 PM the contractions started again – about 40 minutes apart. I went shopping for a few grocery items that we needed; Jason kept the kids. When I got back I got stuff put away and made mac and cheese for supper.

While doing baths and bed routine I had the girls help get their overnight bags ready and Jason and I started timing contractions. They were odd. I never quite knew when one started or stopped or when they peaked. They varied in length and intensity and frequency – anywhere from 1.5 minutes to 2.5 minutes and 3.5 and 6 minutes apart. Between 9 and 10 PM, I called our midwife to get her input and to give her an update. She agreed that the contractions seemed more like practice than the real thing. She advised that we get some rest as best as possible and to keep in touch.

So I went and took a shower and got ready for bed. I slept fitfully on the couch while Jason watched TV. On one of my many trips downstairs to the bathroom we got the bed prepared for me to sleep there and then he did his evening routine. It was around 1AM. At about 20 after 1 I had a tough contraction that gave a kick or a pop. During this contraction Jason suggested that we do something more to cover the bedding in case my water broke. Well, when I stood to allow him to do so, I found myself standing in a puddle. I guess that pop had a purpose – to kick this lagging labor in the butt!

I called our midwife but got her voice mail 2 or 3 times and I got a little concerned that maybe she’d been called out to another birth or something. But I called her pager and she called back around 1:45AM. I told her that my water had broke and that she should come this way. She had a two hour drive ahead of her. The contractions were more intense, more regular and longer. Because she missed our last birth due to inclement weather and the speed of which he came into this world, she asked if I figured she’d make it. I thought she’d have lots of time; the contractions weren’t “that strong”. (I remember her telling me with my very first pregnancy, to call her when “it wasn’t fun anymore”. I wasn’t to that point yet!)

Well, Jason moved me back to the couch. Our little guy (22 months) wouldn’t stay asleep and wanted nothing to do with Daddy. So we decided we had better call the sitter to come and get all the kids. (Earlier we had discussed just letting them sleep and having the sitter run interference in the morning.) When she arrived the little man was sleeping on my tummy and I was well focused on each contraction. So while Jason and our friend did well collecting kids and paraphernalia I did have to direct traffic a little (well, I probably didn’t have to, but I did). They were gone by 2:30AM and it was just Jason and I again.

He positioned himself to help me and I remember saying to him, “I think I’ve stalled.” I had no contractions, no urges to push, nothing. I was just resting, and relaxed. And then all of a sudden a switch seemed to flip and I went full force into push mode. I continued to sit on the couch and got frustrated as it felt like I was preventing the baby from coming out – pushing baby into the couch cushion. I moved to the floor, kneeling on a blanket for warmth. Jason applied counter pressure with each push. I loved how we communicated. No anger or frustration. Just direction here and there. And questions like “Is that good?’ “Need more?” I was amazed at how quickly this seemed to go.

I was worried about tearing. I didn’t seem to be stretching fast or far enough to accommodate baby’s size or speed of delivery. Jason got hot ginger cloths to help soften and soothe, and we gently stretched the skin around her large noggin! I even asked Jason to check that it really was a head and not a butt coming first, but now we see that her butt is smaller than her head. I remember a couple of times changing position to slow her descent. Not that I tried to push her back in, but I just needed some relief and time to stretch a little more.

Finally baby’s head was completely born but the shoulders and body did not follow with the next couple of pushes. Baby was going a little blue. I changed positions a couple of times and still no change. I wasn’t worried but knew that we had to do something soon. Jason got active and right up in there to give a gentle tug. He must have missed the catch because there she was beside me. (We were expecting a boy; just a gut feeling and the way I was carrying her in pregnancy.) I scooped her up and started rubbing and patting to get her crying and breathing. It was 3:30AM.

She was beautiful pink all over in just a few seconds. Clear soft skin. And lungs! The girl has lungs!

Jason moved the two of us to the couch and started covering us with blankets. He had the temperature so high in the house that he was sweating like crazy but baby and I were so cold. Then the contractions for the placenta hit. OUCH! But no sight of it. Normal for me is within the first half hour, but being that this whole delivery was abnormal, I shouldn’t have been surprised.

Our midwife called from the road about 20 minutes after baby was born. She asked if I was going to wait for her and I had to apologize saying, “I just couldn’t. She wanted to come out so badly!” She was another 20 minutes away yet. I still hadn’t delivered the placenta when they (she’d stopped to pick up a support /backup midwife) arrived. Our midwife had time to deal with the cord before the next contraction came. (Jason had gone outside and really had no interest in cutting the cord; he considered himself “off duty” once they arrived.) With that contraction the placenta arrived all in one piece; it was very large, almost like another baby! In fact, earlier while we were waiting and the contractions were so “brutal” I questioned whether there was another baby in there but after some poking Jason and I decided that we were parents again to only one more baby, not two.

I am so pleased to say that that I did not pass out this time. Not when they moved me to a more comfortable position, nor when I got up (was helped up) to pee in a bucket. And I haven’t since! My body “got it right” this time. Oh, I’m feeling the pain of sore muscles and such of the pregnancy and delivery, but nothing like after the last speedy entry.

I did not know the baby’s name. When the midwife was doing her paperwork and asked, I just looked at Jason. He named her and I am so pleased with what he chose. I got to choose the spelling though and I love the letter Y so of course that went in!

Rayna, Jason and I spent the day on the couch – in and out of sleep, watching TV, phoning family and friends. The other children came home late in the afternoon. Another friend brought supper and bathed all the kids. Then at bedtime a third woman and our sitter came by with gifts and to put the older ones to bed. We have been so blessed.

Baby Rayna is well looked after and loved. A new baby always shows me the older children’s personalities. K(7) is a little momma – holding and changing diapers, bossing the other children. CJ(6) thinks baby is just a live doll whose clothes need changing regularly. M(3.5) just loves to talk about her baby sister but can never remember her name. W(22mon and only boy) pokes and pats and hugs; he’s feeling the pinch of not being the baby anymore; this “baby sissa” is always in the way, in his spot beside or on mommy.

I’ve never gone into labor early, so that was a pleasant surprise. I was very glad I had done as much prep work as I had – packing bags, collecting supplies and buying things for the newborn. I had activities planned for the next couple of weeks to keep us occupied and have had to change those plans, but that’s okay. We are loving on this baby and taking the time needed to recover and adjust to her being with us now. And we are welcoming guests; we are far from bored!

Homebirth Supply List from my Midwife

J and I have been supported and loved by the same midwife for 5 of our 6 pregnancies. We love her to pieces!

I remember when she first handed me this list with K's pregnancy. I was sooooo overwhelmed. Why would I need all of this stuff, just to deliver a baby and how was I going to pay for it? What is all this stuff anyway??? Well, now the list is not so daunting. I'm gonna post it here and explain what and why each item is suggested or needed.

Supplies For A Home Birth
Things To Purchase

• at least 12 disposable incontinence under pads (22 in by 30 in) - These are the blue plastic-y things they put under you in the hospital, although sometimes the hospital ones are washable. I've had both.
  
• maxi pads (overnight) or toddle size disposable diapers for mother for first couple of days postpartum. Do not buy Always brand maxi-pads. - Always brand irritates the skin that is already tender from the birth. She said Kotex was a good brand. These are huge and cover from front waist to back waist!!! You won't want to wear them more than the first couple of days!
  
• thermometer
• fresh ginger root - this is for a hot poultice. She uses the crock pot, listed below to warm water and the root together. Then as the head is crowning she applies wash clothes dipped in this and I have never torn!!!
  
• Gatorade (at least 2 liters) - Gotta keep everyone hydrated!!
  
• K-Y Jelly (small tube, unopened) - to listen to the heartbeat of the baby as contractions hit and such
  
• 1 bottle hydrogen peroxide - disinfecting things??? lol
  

Things To Gather
Linens - please note that all linens used for underpads should be light colored.

• 3 old, large bath towels (for baby, any color) - for clean up after birth.
  
• 3 old double size sheets for underpads; folded separately: 36" by 36" finished size (for mother, light color) - These are much nicer to lay on than the plastic. We actually made ours a little different. We took those blankets that are kinda rough and yet fuzzy cut to 36 by 36 doubled and covered with a white sheet. We sewed around the edges. They are great for more than just after the birth; we've used them for night potty training, for sickies, for "the time of the month", etc. They protect the matress quite well.
  
• 3-4 hand towels (for midwife)
• plenty of old wash clothes; or several extra hand towels or old cloth diapers (for mother, light color)
• 2-3 large, flat flannel sheets or cotton blankets (for mother, any color)
• 3-4 bath towels for using after bathing following the birth (any color) - All of the above are simply for wash up and clean up and keeping warm. Whatever is needed.
  

These need to be washed in hot water (with bleach, optional) and dried in a very hot dryer or hung outside in the bright sunshine. Wash six old pillowcases with the load. Once everything is clean and dry, place the items according to type into the pillowcases. Label each package and place the packages into a clean plastic bag. Most of these items will be washed after the birth, but they should be old things that could be thrown away.

Clothing

• clean panties, overnight maxi pads, and nursing nightgown for mother; bra if you wish - or whatever clothes mother will be comfortable in after delivery
  
• clothing for baby, a diaper, and a receiving blanket or two - just to clothe the baby
  
• pack a separate bag for mom and babe (3 weeks before your due date) in the even of transfer to hospital

Other Essential Items

• heavy plastic sheet for the bed and extra heavy plastic for floor; duct tape - gotta keep the mess contained!
  
• 1 flat cake pan (9by13) for the placenta; 2 ice cream buckets with lids - something to put the placenta in for examination; to make sure it's all there.
  
• crock pot or large soup pot - mentioned above
  
• large garbage pail with 3-4 bags handy - to help contain the mess
  
• laundry basket - to help contain the mess
• squeeze bottle - for rinsing bottom after birth, as wiping can be painful
  

Extras

• pillows with old pillowcases - for comfort during labor
  
• baby powder or oil for massage
• straws that bend - it's hard to drink from a cup when in labor!!!
  
• ice chips or popsicles made ahead of time from a favorite juice or herbal tea - I've never done this. Just drank the Gatorade or pop from below.
  
• flat ginger ale with sugar; snacks and juice
• hot water bottle or heating pad - this is nice to have. I might see if I can get a heating pad from a secondhand store, or just use wheat bags (homemade Magic Bags).
  
• extension cords. - incase outlets aren't handy.
  

Making The Bed
First put on the sheets for resting after the birth. Have the top sheet and fresh pillowcases handy but not on the bed. Next, securely cover entire mattress with heavy plastic. Finally, place on the bed an old fitted sheet that could be thrown away if needed. Remove your best blankets, but have other blankets handy for the bed during the birth. - I have never given birth on the bed while birthing at home, but I guess it could happen this time.

Well, we are doing okay with collecting things as I know I have most somewhere here in the house. It is just a matter of collecting them all into one place. I'd like to have this done by the middle of October.