Women Teaching Men?

I shared this article - The Woman Teacher -  on Facebook last night.  I created quite a stir in some individuals and a great discussion ensued.  I love food for thought.  And usually,though not always, I love to be caused to think about things a little deeper than just on the surface.

I posted the few paragraphs below as a response on Facebook (modified to make more sense, without the context), but thought I would share them here as well.

A few thoughts.

I too have a higher degree than my husband, but I respect his authority as the head of our home.

Our society does not "dictate a woman's role to be submissive and play the back up role to the mighty man for the household".  To me, the Bible is very clear that the MAN is the HEAD of the HOME just as CHRIST is the HEAD of the CHURCH.

I am not LESS because I CHOOSE not to teach men or work outside the home.  I HAVE a HUGE responsibility that I take very seriously.  My job is to HELP my husband be the BEST that he can possibly be.  My job is to be his MATE and his PARTNER in the trouble of life that we face as a TEAM.  My part in that TEAM is to be his safe place to fall.  My part in that TEAM is to raise our family.  My part in that TEAM may include making his meals and cleaning his clothes.  My part in that TEAM is to encourage him and love him and prepare him to go back out there and face the world.

His job is not easy; he provides well for our large and growing family.  The LEAST I can do is create an atmosphere of peace in our home.

That is my JOB and it does not make me less of a person, but MORE of a WOMAN.

I believe, and will stand by what I believe, that WOMEN should not be teaching in the church (specifically) and should apply that principle to her life in every area.  That is not to say that I can not enter into discussions.  I may have something that one of those men need to hear.  However, my tone and my manner need to be respectful of, first and foremost, my husband and his position in the community and the church and secondly, respectful of his (and that of the other men) ego.

Yes, I said ego.  Men have HUGE egos.  I believe it will serve women well to stroke those egos a little more.  To build our men up.  We need to lift them in prayer and in our words and actions.  We need to encourage them to take roles in our churches.  We need to step back and allow them to lead, allow them to be in the positions GOD wants them.

Lifting men up and supporting them ("Behind every great man. . . .") makes them love us more!  I want to be loved and cherished and if I have to stroke my husbands ego, what does that really "put me out"?  A little time?  Maybe.  A little energy?  Probably.

But the rewards for me ARE AMAZING.  The response I receive in return for that little time and that little energy carry me through to the next day and beyond.  Not only are the rewards for me directly but for my children and our community.

Now, I said I was  going to agree to disagree, but this is something that I really feel strongly about as you can probably tell.  And I can't and won't keep silent.

I pray that my message gets through to someone, because my message isn't MINE.  I believe it is one that has been TOO long in coming, TOO long kept silent.

I would like to add, that this is not teaching coming from my parents.  This is research and trial and error and trying again and reading and learning that I have done on my own.  Whether my parents agree or disagree, I will leave that for them to say or not say.

And this is not pushed on me by my opinionated and strong-willed husband.  We have been learning and growing through this process together.  We have tried me working.  We have tried me "leading".  When I saw all these things not working, I went searching in God's Word and through His servants to find the answers I was looking for.

 Some other questions came up too.  Here is my response:

Just my brief and quick response, gut feeling, opinion. 

Yes, the passage is specific to church and to men.  I think there is a difference between men and boys in that as mothers we need to be instructing and teaching them.  I think that men should be teaching in every setting.  Strictly my opinion though.  Women should be at home, raising those boys to be men, REAL men. 

In a group Bible study setting, I think it’s a little different.  It’s a discussion.  I say contribute to the conversation, with your husband’s approval, of course.  I personally tend to sit back and listen, but that’s also my personality.

  

The other day in church a friend (female) got up to share something God had laid on her heart.  She did this, not only with the support of her husband but with the support of our pastor.  She was not “preaching” or “teaching” although what she said had those qualities as well.  This message that she shared was one of repentance and asking for forgiveness.  I would say that this was totally acceptable.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Thought Provoking Discussions

My Saturday evening has been spent studying and discussing with friends. It has been interesting and tough. Things discussed include: the correct sabbath day, hell, predestination, who has the right religion/belief. Some of these things will never be agreed upon between us; I think we may just have to agree to disagree on the specifics. We each feel very strongly about what we believe; we believe that we are right and the others are wrong and vise versa.



I believe that we do not have to observe Saturday as the Sabbath. I was just reading over at Blue Letter Bible about why Christians moved to Sunday versus continuing with Saturday. They have some good points. Those who observe the Lord's Day on Saturday have valid points as well. Can we both be right? Or is one wrong? Does it really matter? Is it a salvation issue? The point our friend brought up tonight is that this is one of the 10 Commandments. God obviously thinks it is important, but what is important about it - the specific day or that we actually take the time one day in a week to honor him and to rest? Or what about this - we like to rest on Saturday and meet for worship on Sunday? Some would consider us lazy then. We just can't win; you can't please everyone.

I believe there is a hell. Some questions that came up: are there different levels of hell? Will our bodies burn forever? Or is hell for our souls and our bodies will just burn up and be consumed by the fire, but our souls burn forever? Does it really matter? Or does it simply matter that we do believe that God will punish those who do not follow him?

We didn't discuss it a lot but part of the conversation did turn toward predestination and free will. Do we really have a free will? Or is God directing a lot more than we give Him credit for? Or does he give and take our free will at his discretion? So if God is deciding that some are predestined for heaven and some are not then that means God wants people to go to hell? How does that fit in with our lovey dovey view of God? But if there is free will, how do we really know that we have the right way? The free will adds an element of doubt.

Do Christians really have the right path? Or is it some other group / cult / religion? Where or how do you balance questioning / doubt / learning / education / debate? Where do you draw the line?

I think I'll take a break. My head hurts. I am open and willing to learn and read and try to understand. I don't really want to be mediocre; I want to be more like Christ. However, there is that aspect of having the faith of a little child. I might just go back to that and not think so hard and so long about these HUGE issues. I feel more confused than when we started.

I am saved from my sins; Jesus is my Savior. I am going to heaven; there is a hell. Free will or not, I'm with HIM. Until God shows me otherwise, my conscience is clear resting on Saturday and meeting for worship on Sunday. And I pray for lively, friendly, educating discussions that create peace in our hearts and our homes; that God teaches each one where s/he is at that moment and brings each one closer to Himself.

The striving is evident tonight!

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Confused. Tested. Unsure.

I have a friend who is hurting today. She is confused and physically bruised. Her dh got violent. She still loves him. But doesn't want this. She has a lot of decisions to make in the next few hours and days. I am praying for her and for her dh and their many children. I am very sad for them.

Why am I so confused? Why do I feel tested and unsure? It's a matter of balance and of legalism. I have a very strict point of view and belief on divorce. At least I think I do. I feel that although God allows for divorce in specific circumstances, I don't believe that's what He wants for His children. He wants families to stay together as a unit. Do I believe that God wants a woman to live with abuse? Of course not. Am I an expert on this subject? By no means. I don't even have real life experience.

My friend and her dh were just getting on their feet again. Honestly, I feel like this is an attack on their marriage and their "getting ahead" and becoming the family they were meant to be. I know that I don't know the whole story. I only get what she tells me. (And there are three sides to every story - his, hers, and the truth.) Satan does not want families that love God to stay together.

How do we define what God wants us to do? I would say that we go to the Bible. What does the Bible say on this topic? I think I will be looking into this a little more.

Some other questions that came up in my thinking of this topic, that I don't really have answers for:

Is God's love an ends justifies the means? Is God's love for us separate from His laws and the principles we are to live by??? Or is His love wrapped up in those principles and laws? Just like we as parents have for our children, God has rules and guidelines for us too. Because He loves us.

I am so thankful for the man I have been given. I have been incredibly blessed by one who has never raised a hand (or foot) in anger. He is a man that has a very high level of control in most areas of life. He's not given to addictions or such things. I can trust that a decision made has been thought through and is not just a willy-nilly response.

More thoughts on divorce and such things (from one who's never been there):

Divorce is always wrong. We are to submit to our dh's. That doesn't mean one has to accept the beatings. Rather we need to get the proper authorities involved and get him (and herself) help. Keep ourselves and our children save. This has been my belief, developed over time. Do I really believe that? Is that what I would do? In today's world, would there be ANYONE that would support me in that? Or would I be totally on my own? And if so, would I be strong enough? Who is my strength? Who is my friend's strength?

What does the Bible say? What's the real deal? Not watered down? Not hyper-religious? Not legalistic? I'm tired of the chaff! I want the meat. Anyone have any answers???? Is it situational? Is God a situational God???


Striving to learn and live God's purposes,