A Wise Woman Told Me

A wise woman told me just the other day, four things that she has learned over the years.  They are simple things, but if you do them, life will be just a little bit easier for you and your family.

 

1. Just get started.

2. Use what you have on hand.

3. Clean up as you go.

4. AND, I can’t remember the fourth one!!!!! 

 

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH .  I told DH that I was going to call her and ask what the 4th one was.  He’s not sure she’d remember, and I kinda agree with him.  She might not.  But then again, she just might.  It’s funny because the day she was here and told me this list, we couldn’t remember #3 for a while.  Now, I can’t remember #4.

 

Who is this wise woman?  “Grandma” Irene Halhead.  She’s in her 70s and still very active in our community.  She’s planning birthday parties, baking goodies, and making blankets.  I’ve been making a point to do things with her this year.  Although I don’t call her and make arrangements often, she calls here once a week or so.  She’ll pop over and offer to fold laundry or do dishes.  Most of the time now, I just tell her that we should just visit.  Besides, just this last time, everything was caught up or very manageable.

 

I have come to love and appreciate this woman over the last four years.  Her home was one of the first homes we visited when we started attending the Baptist church here.  Even “Grandpa” Ted, claims our children as “like our own grandchildren”.

 

I know that my family is not the only ones that feel a special connection with Mr. and Mrs. Halhead.  They have touched this community with God’s love.  They live that love every single day.  They are missed in church, if they are ill, or away visiting their children.

 

She’s said to me a time or two, “I’m not going to be here forever.”  They are getting on in years, both of them.  And I’ve said, to her, “I hope and pray that I’m as active as you are when I’m your age!”  She just gaffed and said that she wasn’t that old, or wasn’t that active or something. 

 

I love how she is honest with me if she’s not doing well.  I’ll ask her and she’ll say, “Medium, about medium.”  And I know, because I can see it in her walk and in her face.  If she’s anything less than medium, she stays home.  The “medium” days are getting more often and I can see how tired she is.  When she’s having a good day, she’s laughing and teasing Jason and bouncing the kids.

 

I didn’t start this post as it has turned out.  I started this post to talk about the 4 things she told me the other day.  To expand on them and tell how they work in my life.  How I’ve been learning them too.  But it’s turned into a memoir of sorts.  So I guess, I’ll have to write my original intentions at a later date.

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

My Church Family

My church family is hurting again.  Over and over and over again.

 

Thankfully there are bits of happiness mixed in there.  A new baby boy and his new baby girl cousin!

 

But the new baby boy and his momma had to be hospitalized.  :(

 

Broken bones.

 

Emergency surgery.

 

Deaths.

 

I’m not handling it well tonight.  I am hurting for the hurting.

 

I think I’d handle it better, if it were me.

 

But I don’t want that either.

 

I wonder

 

what is God doing?

 

Why are we under such persecution?

 

Why is He stretching us so far, so tight?

 

He must be creating a GREAT WORK in us.

 

And, I guess that should encourage me.

 

But tonight it doesn’t.

 

Tonight, I will cry.

 

Tonight, I will cry, until my hubby is home save.  And then probably cry some more.

 

God, help us to learn what we need to learn.  God, help us to become the people you want us to be.  Lord, continue to mould us.  Strengthen us.  Lead us.  God, I ask especially that you be with those hurting.  And those rejoicing.  Guide our pastor! And his team of elders!  Lord, they need you in a special way.  2011 has been rough on us.  Be our comfort, Lord.  Be our hope!  Amen.

 

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Another Godly Man Gone Home

The year 2011 has been one of sadness, injury and death for our church.  I’ve shared about this before on my blog.  This week another pillar of our church went to be with his God.  Prior to 2011, our church had some struggles with our previous pastor.  God has kept this group of believers.  We are strong and we are continuing to follow has He leads.  Our numbers appear to me to be growing as well.  It seems as if every time we turn around, we are dealt another hurtful blow, but we keep stepping up to the plate and facing the issue, the hurt, the sadness head on.

 

I am proud of my church family.  I am pleased to know them and be a part of this body of believers.

 

I said to a friend the other day that God is causing us to grow.  He is raising us up and changing and challenging us in a way we haven’t been before.  (at least not in the time I’ve been in attendance)  We have been milk drinkers, bench warmers and couch potatoes.  We asked our leadership for more discipleship.  I know they are working in that direction.  We asked our God (obviously) to teach us and train us, because He is.  Life itself is teaching and training us.

 

I believe we have become a people who are no longer content with milk; we want some meat!

 

Our men, strong in their faith, men who have served their church and their fellow believers have been taken home to be with their Lord and Savior.  These men are pillars and they aren’t here to hold us up anymore.  We have their legacy to go on, but now we really have to do the work.  We can’t just ride on the coat-tails of these individuals.  I’m not saying we were just riding, but there is that tendency to take the easy way, right?

 

My thoughts then move forward.  What does God have in store for us?  What great thing are we, as a body of believers, going to do for His glory, for His kingdom?  As we can see from the examples we’ve been given (in the men who have served and gone on ahead of us), God’s word does not return void.  He is going to do something great through us.

 

I see so many examples in our church already.  Plans for a DVBS.  Serving the homeless in a neighboring community.  Discipleship training programs.  And so much potential, yet untapped.  I can’t wait for the years to come and I pray that God allows me and my family to stay in this community to see the potential sprung  in the future!

 

As sad as we are, with the loss of another good and faithful servant, I am excited.  I am so happy for them to be with their Lord.  And I am excited to see what God is going to take us, what He is going to grow in and through us.

 

People of MBC, take heart.  God is with us.  He will continue to sustain us.

 

Praise His HOLY Name.

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Some pictures–Please enjoy!

 

Doc loves to be outside with the children; I think on this day they were sledding down the hill, until they broke disc they were sliding on.

 

The three oldest girls participated in a Clay for Kids activity; I didn’t get a picture of Marrissa’s, not sure why.  The girls had so much fun with all the other homeschoolers that participated that day.  The first day we made the creations, then about 4 weeks later we met again to paint them and have lunch together.  I had such a great time visiting with some of the other moms.

 

 

These are my men.  Aren’t they adorable?!?!  I had fun taking the pictures.  It’s not very often that the three of them sit together like this.  Matty wasn’t into sitting still for the picture as you can see.  The other two just wanted to make faces at me.  I can’t wait to get the three of them in their fire dept. shirts and get picture; it will be so sweet.

 

 

On the weekend of April 9th and 10th, Jason and I worked together and created this space for me and the kids in the room across from the dining room.  The “brown shelf” is now my homeschool shelf (prior to this is held my coffee, toaster, etc.).  The lighter shelf next to it is a combination of things.  It is here that I have my control journal, the Green Works to spray the table. Behind the glass doors is the snack cupboard.  The door is the cereal cupboard.  The bottom two shelves will hold things that are too big to put anywhere else – things like cases of pop, juice, paper towel, disposable plates and cups. 

Now the other shelf (second picture) is made of two corner cabinets, like what would be in a kitchen; Jason put them together and put a nice piece of plywood on top.  I love it because it’s fresh and new and clean and more kitchen like; I can pretend my kitchen is coming sooner.  lol.  The coffeepot and toaster are perfect on top, better than on that other shelf.  This will be easier to clean and easier to operate.

 

 

On April 11th, Grandma Irene came for a visit.  She always gets our butts in gear.  On this day, she directed traffic and folded laundry.  We got the main living room and dining room in great shape and swept up the floor.  I just need to get the children to put away their clothes.

After a short visit, she asked if the oldest three could come for a visit at her house.  She brought them home in time for choir class.  Irene is getting older and often has pain in her legs.  I want to make the most of each day that she is able to spend with us and our community.  I am making a point of saying yes, when she phones for a visit (whether at my home or hers); I am making  a point of letting the children visit with her.  And I took an opportunity today to snag a picture or two; my children will love these pictures.  The third one, Irene wanted to get.

I don’t think I’m old enough to be mom to that large group of children, but here I am, mom to 6!

 

I hope you enjoyed my little “slideshow”; I know a number of my readers have been asking for pictures and day to day happenings.

 

I aim to please.

 

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Thankful for . . . .

friends with blades and quads!

 

and lots of patience for children!

 

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

If I had an anonymous blog…

. . . . hey, wait . . . . I do have an anonymous blog.  Well, it is almost anonymous.  I have one person who reads; she keeps me accountable so I don’t go too nutso over there.

I don’t blog there very often any more.  I wanted a place where I didn’t feel the need to censor myself to the same degree as I feel I need to do here at Just Our Thoughts.  If I’m angry at my husband or a friend is driving me mad, I won’t post about that here.  So why do I feel the need to post such things on a blog?  Well, I look at blogging a lot the same as journaling, or Dear Diary.  I vent best with the written / typed word.  Once my venting is over, I can usually continue on with life as normal.

 

But you know what’s cool?  Since starting that anonymous blog I have been learning to vent to a friend with my verbal words or  to the person involved.  I rarely blog at that anonymous address anymore.  I love to see growth in myself.  And this is growth I didn’t see until writing this post.

 

Some might be wondering why I feel the need to censor my own thoughts on my own blog.  After all it is mine to do with as I wish.  Why not let it all out?  Well, the reason is relationships.  My husband holds an important position (in my mind at least) in our community.  I do not want to tarnish his relationships or mine in the community by coming unglued on my blog.  (I know I have some local readers.)  Sometimes there is confidentiality issues that dictates what I can and can’t share.  Sometimes I don’t want to offend or hurt my family (I know my mom reads my blog).  I am learning how to share things discreetly but I find it difficult so often I choose not to blog about a specific situation or topic rather than blab!  I try really hard to stay away from gossip in real life and I want to do the same on my blog.

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

My Heart is Sad

 

There is so much going on in my world.  So much hurt and pain and sadness.  No, it’s not in my life specifically, but in the lives of my friends and my family.  My heart aches for them.  On Sunday, my status message on Facebook was: Crying.

 

At the time I posted that status, I was in tears and it only got worse from there.  My mom called because of my status message, wanting to know why, so I shared with her what was going on and she proceeded to confirm more sad news with me.

 

I’ve been thinking about the last six to eight months and all the painful things that have happened in the lives around me.

• New Year’s Day a mom of two young girls from was hurt very very badly in a horse related incident
• got a phone call Sunday about a somewhat unexpected death of a family member of one of the fire fire department families.
• threat of job loss and job loss in our church family
• one fire fighter was in a serious accident resulting in broke legs
• another fire fighter family had a death – vehicle collision
• a serious collision involving some teen boys from our church that Jason responded to as a fire dept. member
• a church member’s mother lost her battle with cancer during the holidays
• and that’s just the things I can mention and not listing all the various illnesses and reports of cancer and deaths in  the extended community.

There are a couple of thoughts I have:

1. God has continued to protect our family in all areas and we have not personally experienced any serious loss or hardship this year.
2. I am sure that God is preparing and refining the believers in my community.  HE plans or already is using us for greatness – for HIS glory!  I hate that the refining process hurts so much.
3. I pray that God continues to use HIS people in the community to bring more souls to a right relationship with HIM.  I pray that we get away from religion and strive for relationship.

And I cry for those in the midst of pain and turmoil.

 

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Keeping Our Children In Church

A friend of mine wrote on her blog - Compartmentalizing Religion -  about keeping our children in church and training and teaching them at a very young age to be “on fire” for God. I asked her if I could re-post most of her thoughts here.  I will save my comments for another post.  Here’s what she had to say:

The Last Unreached People Group
A lot of people talk about "unreached people groups" - by which they mean groups of people (usually nations or ethnicities) to whom Jesus is a foreign concept, the Bible is unknown and unavailable in their language, and where there are no churches.

We send missionaries there to learn the language, bring valuable practical skills such as agricultural training or computer training, or basic sanitation practices, food programs, schools for the children who are currently being forced to work to support their family.

None of these things are bad.  In fact, they are laudable, and beautiful expressions of who Jesus is -

JEHOVAH-ROHI

Psalm 23:1

The Lord my shepherd

JEHOVAH-SHAMMAH

Ezekiel 48:35

The Lord who is present

JEHOVAH-RAPHA

Exodus 15:26

The Lord our healer

JEHOVAH-JIREH

Genesis 22:13-14

The Lord will provide

JEHOVAH-SHALOM

Judges 6:24

The Lord is peace

EL ROI

Genesis 16:13

The strong one who sees

Through their acts, they gain the right to speak into their new friend's lives, telling them about the reasons for their life choices...

JEHOVAH—YAHWEH

Genesis 2:4

God's divine salvation

JEHOVAH-TSIDKENU

Jeremiah 23:6

The Lord our righteousness

JEHOVAH-MACCADDESHEM

Exodus 31:1

The Lord thy sanctified

 

 

But there is one people group that is consistently of no concern to most churches and leaders (with the hugely notable exception of David Walters, who proclaims the obvious but ignored truth that children don't have "a jr. Holy Spirit".. The children of the western world are coddled, babysat, fed pablum, and told to come back to church when they are 18 and can do great things for God. Why can't they be on fire for God before then?  Why can they not share their faith, lead in worship, pray for the sick, be a real part of the church body instead of something we hide away in musty back rooms while adults get down to the "adult business" of having church? Why?  

 

When we see people like Zach Taylor writing books as a teenager, speaking about Generation Change, and speaking out against slavery, which is happening more now than ever before in human history? Why?  When Alex and Brett Harris are writing books challenging "low expectations" among the youth themselves and encouraging them to "Do Hard Things?" Why?  When beautiful siblings, the Malleys, write books full of encouragement to their peers to love their brothers and sisters and see it as not only part of their spiritual worship, but part of the spiritual disciplines we are called to as brothers and sisters in Christ? 

 

I'll tell you why, but you may not want to hear it. Truth is, we hate children.  That sounds extreme, doesn't it? Even if children do want to be involved in the Body, we don't know how to involve them because we are so very heavily invested in the surrounding culture that sees children as barely human until they reach 18, 21, 25, 30 - the bar gets higher and higher for adulthood and responsibility, and although it may be out of a sense of misplaced love that mutilates and arrests development, it's also part of a culture that thinks killing babies is all right. 

 

And churches are not different from the rest of the world. If you want to argue with me, go look at the stats first.   Roman Catholics are a tiny bit less likely to get an abortion, but all other denominations have *no difference* in abortion rates from those who claim no religious affiliation. What kind of schizophrenia would it require for us, as churches to embrace children from the earliest ages, holding them in our arms during prayer time, helping them sing along when they are too young to read the words for themselves, teaching them to memorize God's Word from  the time they say their first words...  

 

Okay, I'll admit.  I have an axe to grind.  Or is it seven arrows to sharpen for flight, to be like the sword of the Spirit?  

Hebrews 4:12
For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.

I want my children to learn discernment.  I want them to learn to hear God's voice.  I am teaching them at home to the best of my abilities, but the church as a whole is not helping.

In fact, it is a huge hindrance to what I'm trying to do with my children. I want to teach them to sacrifice, the church wants to put on parties.  I want them to learn to pray, the church brings candies and dangles them in front of the children. Parties are not bad, and I'm not even that strict about sweets.  But can children learn to enjoy the presence of God when they are constantly distracted?

  

We have the same Holy Spirit.  We need to share Him with our children, too...  And the work of the Spirit in our lives as well as theirs begins with holiness and passion for His will.

Clean hands, a pure heart.

Some interesting thoughts, no?  I thought so.  But like I said, I’ll save my thoughts for another day.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Camping – what I learned.

This long weekend just passed we went camping with our church family.  My dh and I both grew up in camping families.  We have many fun memories from our childhoods surrounding yearly camping trips.  I have wanted to capture some of those memories for our own children.  Since we got married in 2000, we have gone on only a couple of camping trips – the first year we were married J and I went for about a week and then a couple summers ago we went with my best friend and her family for one night.

 

Okay, on to what this trip has taught me.

The very first camping trip (after not going for years and years and years) is expensive.  There are things you need to and want to purchase to make the trip enjoyable.  Some of the things we purchased we could have done without this time (and every time, probably).  Other things, like food, we really needed.

Packing for 7 can be a lot of work!  My three oldest children packed their own clothing, with instructions on how much of each item to pack.  So that cut my work load down a bit.  I had to pack clothing for myself and the little two.  When W started to pack his own bag, he filled it with Duplo Blocs; that kinda tells me he’s not quite ready to pack his on his own, even with instructions.

Who says you need a tent or a camper?  hee hee.  We slept in our vehicles.  The children slept in the bus and J and I planned to sleep in the Charger.  However, the air mattress we purchased was about a foot too long for the back of the truck.  We had a tarp and planned to sleep under that, as we did not have a tent.  However, another family had brought a couple of tents – one for them and one for their teen daughter.  The daughter graciously gave up her tent for us.  We will need to purchase a tent!

We went for three days to a group campsite, so the cost was minimal that way.  The church accepted donations to help pay for the site.

I learned that I pack too much food and not enough clothing or blankets.  We talked about staying an extra night.  We would have been okay for food; in fact we will be eating the leftovers from our camping trip for the next few days.  I did not take into account bedwetting, falling in the river more than once, very cool evenings.

One thing that I took that I was so very glad we packed were the walkie-talkies.  With these in hand, the children were able to go to the park at the other end of the campground and still have contact with us.  I like to give our children this freedom and responsibility.  I think this teaches them a lot.  I was so surprised with how responsible, and obedient they were when they were called back to camp.  I was very pleased.  Of course we had the rule that they had to go in pairs at least, never alone.

Camping with a group (or another family) will be very different than if we were camping alone.  With a group, if there is something you’ve forgotten (a pot, a cutting board, a flipper for pancakes) someone will probably have that item.  When you are on your own, you will have to make due.

Bring toilet paper!  I am so glad that we remembered.  Even though the campground did provide the outhouses with toilet paper, the supply was not consistent!  There could have been times when we would have been without had we not carried our own in our vehicles.

I think we will plan to set up the camp a little differently next time.  Our tent was set up close to the road.  We had a drunk driver come through the group camping area (not one of our members) in the middle of the night; things were a little scary for a while.  I was concerned that this driver could have driven over our tent or another close to us.  I would rather have our vehicles closest to the road for protection.

Unpacking s.u.c.k.s!  We have been home for 24 hours now and have only unpacked the basics – food and the needed clothing and bedding.  Sigh.  It’s a rainy day today, so I’m sure that is not helping.  Really though, I can’t wait to get things re-organized so we can go again.  I think better organization will be key to having more fun and more spontaneity.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Women Teaching Men?

I shared this article - The Woman Teacher -  on Facebook last night.  I created quite a stir in some individuals and a great discussion ensued.  I love food for thought.  And usually,though not always, I love to be caused to think about things a little deeper than just on the surface.

I posted the few paragraphs below as a response on Facebook (modified to make more sense, without the context), but thought I would share them here as well.

A few thoughts.

I too have a higher degree than my husband, but I respect his authority as the head of our home.

Our society does not "dictate a woman's role to be submissive and play the back up role to the mighty man for the household".  To me, the Bible is very clear that the MAN is the HEAD of the HOME just as CHRIST is the HEAD of the CHURCH.

I am not LESS because I CHOOSE not to teach men or work outside the home.  I HAVE a HUGE responsibility that I take very seriously.  My job is to HELP my husband be the BEST that he can possibly be.  My job is to be his MATE and his PARTNER in the trouble of life that we face as a TEAM.  My part in that TEAM is to be his safe place to fall.  My part in that TEAM is to raise our family.  My part in that TEAM may include making his meals and cleaning his clothes.  My part in that TEAM is to encourage him and love him and prepare him to go back out there and face the world.

His job is not easy; he provides well for our large and growing family.  The LEAST I can do is create an atmosphere of peace in our home.

That is my JOB and it does not make me less of a person, but MORE of a WOMAN.

I believe, and will stand by what I believe, that WOMEN should not be teaching in the church (specifically) and should apply that principle to her life in every area.  That is not to say that I can not enter into discussions.  I may have something that one of those men need to hear.  However, my tone and my manner need to be respectful of, first and foremost, my husband and his position in the community and the church and secondly, respectful of his (and that of the other men) ego.

Yes, I said ego.  Men have HUGE egos.  I believe it will serve women well to stroke those egos a little more.  To build our men up.  We need to lift them in prayer and in our words and actions.  We need to encourage them to take roles in our churches.  We need to step back and allow them to lead, allow them to be in the positions GOD wants them.

Lifting men up and supporting them ("Behind every great man. . . .") makes them love us more!  I want to be loved and cherished and if I have to stroke my husbands ego, what does that really "put me out"?  A little time?  Maybe.  A little energy?  Probably.

But the rewards for me ARE AMAZING.  The response I receive in return for that little time and that little energy carry me through to the next day and beyond.  Not only are the rewards for me directly but for my children and our community.

Now, I said I was  going to agree to disagree, but this is something that I really feel strongly about as you can probably tell.  And I can't and won't keep silent.

I pray that my message gets through to someone, because my message isn't MINE.  I believe it is one that has been TOO long in coming, TOO long kept silent.

I would like to add, that this is not teaching coming from my parents.  This is research and trial and error and trying again and reading and learning that I have done on my own.  Whether my parents agree or disagree, I will leave that for them to say or not say.

And this is not pushed on me by my opinionated and strong-willed husband.  We have been learning and growing through this process together.  We have tried me working.  We have tried me "leading".  When I saw all these things not working, I went searching in God's Word and through His servants to find the answers I was looking for.

 Some other questions came up too.  Here is my response:

Just my brief and quick response, gut feeling, opinion. 

Yes, the passage is specific to church and to men.  I think there is a difference between men and boys in that as mothers we need to be instructing and teaching them.  I think that men should be teaching in every setting.  Strictly my opinion though.  Women should be at home, raising those boys to be men, REAL men. 

In a group Bible study setting, I think it’s a little different.  It’s a discussion.  I say contribute to the conversation, with your husband’s approval, of course.  I personally tend to sit back and listen, but that’s also my personality.

  

The other day in church a friend (female) got up to share something God had laid on her heart.  She did this, not only with the support of her husband but with the support of our pastor.  She was not “preaching” or “teaching” although what she said had those qualities as well.  This message that she shared was one of repentance and asking for forgiveness.  I would say that this was totally acceptable.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Menu Planning Monday - February 1st

Well, it's been a while. I am trying to blog at least semi-regularly. Sorry readers. Let's start the week off with a menu. Here, in no particular order, are the meals I plan to serve at our evening meals this week.

• a meal from my freezer
• individual meatloaves (may do two "batches" that same day - one to eat, one to freeze)
• hash brown casserole (crockpot, maybe and one for the freezer)
• spaghetti with sauce (we don't do meat in our spaghetti, but I might do meatballs the same day as I do the meatloaf, since I'll be working with the ground meat anyway)
• creamy lemon chicken / pork (depends on what's on sale - both meat work with the sauce)
• baked bean casserole

I am discovering the benefits of having my freezers full of meals ready to pull out! I am loving it. And the best thing is that I haven't done the meals! A friend of mine had / has some time on her hands and has been making them and delivering them! I have given her some chicken now to help her out and she will be bringing me more this week! I can't wait. Now I am going to continue the trend. When I make a meal I know we like, I'm going to make two and put one in a freezer. This will require a little bit of planning - like having extra containers to bake and freeze in and a few extra ingredients.

The other thing I've been doing has been helping us not to waste as much food. Very often my leftovers go to waste because they rot in the fridge. I bought a bunch (and need to by more) three cup Glad snap lid containers. I have been dividing the leftovers into individual meals and freezing them. They will be great for lunches or for when Mommy really can't do much. I can say, supper is - pick a meal from the freezer tonight. Everyone can have whatever they want from the freezer.

The beginning of the pregnancy has been really hard on me; I've been very tired. I am so thankful for my church family who has stepped up (I would name all those that have helped but there are a lot of them! And they know who they are!!) and has been helping out. The pregnancy and the transition of J going back to work to a job that requires him to be away a lot (often a week at a time) has been rough on us all. We are starting to get into a routine now; well, two routines - one when he's here and one when he's gone.

Anyway, on to other things. I hope you enjoyed the menu ideas and other tips. For more great menu ideas, click on the picture above to go to Laura's blog. Laura hosts Menu Planning Monday on her blog - I'm an Organizing Junkie.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Do You Have A Tammy-Lee? I Do.

I'm going to proceed to brag on my friend (and her DH). She will say, and I believe her to be correct, that it is God who allows her to do the things she does. I am so thankful that God gave her to me as my dear dear friend. (She's been gone today and I haven't talked to her; I'm going through withdrawals. lol!!!!!)

Some people (like me) are very willing to help their friends and neighbors, but they don't notice the things that need to be done. I can be very generous and very helpful, jumping in when things need to be done. However, I'm not incredibly observant. (Don't ask me to be a witness at an MVC; you would be chasing the wrong color vehicle.) Tammy-Lee isn't like me.

Tammy-Lee (and another friend) "knew" I was pregnant with this baby before I did. She had already started planning and thinking about where I would need help (having been my friend through the last pregnancy). As soon as I announced the blessing, she was on the phone to me asking specific questions about when depression sinks in, when I start to get very very tired, what she could do to keep schooling going for us, and if the kids would be staying with them again when "it's time!"

My dear friend thinks about others; the gifts she (and her DH) gives are not cheesy. They are well thought out and specific to the individual. She listens to what her friends say and watches what they do so that she gets a gift that she knows you will love. Remember my birthday? (Read about it here.) She got me exactly what I wanted!

She gets me organized. So many times my thoughts are muddled and I'll give her a call. When I'm done, we'll have made a decision and a plan of action. I go away feeling so much better than when I started the conversation.

My dh has been off work for almost a whole year. (He was removed from his job in January of 2009 and just now started working full time for a safety company.) I've been spoiled having him home all the time - to run errands, get groceries, mow the lawn, deal with the garden. He's even helped with dishes and laundry and bathing kids. Now, his new job is going to require him to be away a lot sometimes. I'm not sure I can handle it, but she is! And if things are feeling rough I just have to call and ask for help. (It's not just Tammy-Lee that's offered this help either; many from the church have offered to watch kids, grab groceries, etc.)

Tammy-Lee doesn't like my Christmas tree (it's too homemade and not hotel-like) and she doesn't like Survivor. But that's okay. She loves my kids even more than I think I know. I don't understand it, but I am sure okay with it. My kids do need others that love them almost (never quite) as much as I do. They need others to make them behave and remember their manners. My children need "aunts" and "uncles" who make them laugh and wear them out. My Wyatt needs a big boy "cousin" to run him around so he sleeps at night. lol.

I know that even though we haven't talked today that she'll wait until after Survivor is over to call. LOL. (Tammy-Lee, I'll probably watch it late tonight - after J goes to work. heehee)

I'm not the only one who is amazed at all that Tammy-Lee does and is. Others have said so as well. To us, this woman is amazing. To her, the things she does are just par for the course. Tammy-Lee is serving God with her skills, her talents, her gifts. All the time I see her trying to make her relationship with her God better and closer. Every day she is learning and growing.

Is this woman perfect? Do I have her on some sort of pedestal? I don't think so. I am just thankful for the "in real life" friend that God has given me. She's an answer to prayer, because I prayed for a real friend that lived close to me for a long time. She's enough older than me that she's "been there, done that" but not so old that she can't relate or remember.

One day I'll brag on her daughter - my primary babysitter.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

K finally got her turn with Auntie Tammy-Lee

K and my my friend Tammy-Lee had a great day together. They did some baking. And honestly, I don't know everything they did. K is a pretty private person and doesn't tell me a lot of what goes on when she's other places. Here's some pictures of their day together.







Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Today has been an emotional day.

Today, at church, there was a prayer request about a job that J has been waiting for. He has wanted to become a peace officer for a long time. We were never sure when a position would become available. In a few weeks there are two positions going to be available in a neighboring county. And maybe more in our county. The prayer request - that God would bring godly men to these positions. The cool thing is that earlier this week, J called this peace officer to chat. There was no answer so J left him a message to call, but he never got the message. J wanted to ask him to pray with him about the job - that if God wanted J to have the job that they would both be lead in that direction, that they would both get a YES from God that this was the way to move forward. It's hard to say that this is a coincidence; I am thinking it's an open door. But the "downer" side of me (which is often the predominate side of me) says, "whatever, it's just another closed door that just looks open." I want to be excited and I really am, but . . . .

Then secondly, the service today was about how much God had to give up to send His Son to be our Savior and how He must have felt to have him die. We've always made a lot of parallels between our loss of Harvey and Jesus coming to save us. Now, saying it like that sounds really bad and I can't even defend myself because my mind is muddled with grief today and I can't think of the connections we've made in the past. Let's just suffice it to say that today is a hard day for me and for J. I can't shake it; I've been muddled all afternoon.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

CJ spent the day with . . .

Auntie Tammy-Lee on Wednesday (16th).

I took her out to their home even before breakfast. It was around 9:30 but breakfast is late around here. I didn't see or talk to her again until after six in the evening! Here's some pictures:

Playing "Mommy"

What a good little student to do math while away from home!

Look at this face; I know she had a great day. She's so happy!

Polly Pockets get easily lost around here, so the few they've had are lost,
but there are lots at Auntie Tammy-Lee's.

CJ is a very private little girl; she has not said much about her day away.
She told me she had fun doing such things as:
playing polly pockets
eating chocolate chip pancakes
getting a make over
riding a horse

She felt very special having Tammy-Lee all to herself for most of the day. There were no hissy fits like W had when she got home. She just rejoined the "ranks". However, the "ranks" knew she was away; the bunch of them played very well together for most of the next day! I think they missed their CJ.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Little W spent the day away from home.

My friend Tammy-Lee (who blogs here) is such a great woman! She called me up the other day and said, "Hey, I was thinking that I would love to have each of your children spend a day at my house, each one on their own day." How do you say no to that? Who would want to? Tammy-Lee is my closest friend here in town; I talk to her at least once a day. (J would say100 times a day, but that's an exaggeration.) My kids love her and Seven (her dh, aka 7) and usually call them Uncle Seven and Auntie Tammy-Lee.


Last night W came to me and said, "Auntie Tammy-Lee come visit now." I said, "Why don't we call her and you can ask?" "Yep!" So I dialed (W is 2.5 yrs old) and he asked her. She said that she would come but her temporary job got in the way and she couldn't stop by that evening. So when she called to tell me so, she asked if today could be W's day at her home. There was no reason why not, so when we got up we gave her a call and she came to get him.

They left here around 11 I think. I got one call from them just after lunch and then he came home just before 4. They had so much fun jumping on the trampoline, playing with the dogs and driving in a little car. He didn't want to come home. When he saw that Tammy-Lee had removed his carseat from her van he fell to the ground crying! When he realized that she had left, he wandered around the yard crying to go back to her house!



Do you think they had fun?!?!?

For Tammy-Lee's version of the day, go check out her blog.



Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Date Night - A Plan For The Future

Okay, so dates seem to be few and far between right now. And that's okay; I've come to expect that a little with five little ones roaming around here. It's not a sitter issue; it's not a money issue even; it's a planning issue I think. There are ways that we could have a date without spending money or even getting a sitter. But we just fail to plan.

When you fail to plan, you plan to fail.

Who said that? Do you know? I guess I could do an internet search for it. . . . . . Didn't find anything. Oh well.

Any who, back to planning a date. So, I'm going to plan one. And this is my plan.

Find a sitter. Check!
Get dressed up like I did today.
Go out for coffee and dessert with my guy at our local sandwich shoppe.
That's it. That's all I need.

I'll tell you all about it in my next Date Night post!

So early next week, maybe Tuesday or Wednesday, that's the plan. Grandma Irene has offered to come watch the kids for a couple of hours.




We spent the afternoon and evening at Grandma Irene and Grandpa Ted's on Tuesday. It was a wonderful break that we all needed I think. It was a beautiful summer day; not too hot but certainly not cold. The kids pushed each other on the swing set; W got to play with tractors and see the pigs and cows that he had been begging to go see. J helped in the barn in exchange for 2 pair of much needed pants! Remember this post?? We had supper together and she and I played a game of Scrabble. We hadn't been out to visit this lovely couple for way too long.

I love how Grandpa Ted calls us "Brother" and "Sister". He is a dear man of God, who loves music and sings the old hymns all the time.

Grandma Irene raised five children. (Well, they both did, but you know what I mean.) She knows the stresses and the joys. When I told her about some of the things J and I had been discussing and dealing with she was so matter of fact and ready to jump in to help. Now, Grandma Irene is getting on in years and she does not jump much any more but she sure would love to. She said, "Just call, if you need help. If I can't come right then, I'll send someone else, that I trust. You know," she said, "You can't just get anyone to help; I'd send someone who I know would be a help." I told her, "You know what, if you can't come right then, you can pray, and that will help as much."

Tuesday was such a blessing. And today was a lot of fun.

Today, I spent most of the day away from the computer and with the kids. Well, the afternoon and evening anyway. It was great. J left in the late morning to work on the seats for our bus (retrofitting (is that the right word) van seats to work in the bus) and called asking me to bring something to him. Since I was planning on going out anyway, I thought it was as good a time as any. The kids were so excited! So we ran some errands, had a picnic at the gazebo just down the block and came home.

It was so very hot. When we got home, Baby R was sleeping in the stroller so I left her there in the shade. I told the girls to get changed and I stripped W down. He has (make that HAD) a resistance to the pool. He did not want to get in, but I carried him and held him and stayed right by him. Well, I think I'm going to have trouble keeping him out now! He loves it! And has made so much progress already! I am so excited! When Baby R woke, I even put her in with us for a little bit. We served supper outside because the house was so hot still. The kids got back in the pool for their "bath" and then off to bed. The house is cooling down and it is quiet. Tomorrow is another day to have more fun.

Striving to learn and live God's purposes,

Remember my friend . . .

I talk about this fun and caring lady so much on my blog and now she's started her own. (Nope, it's not my mom, I blogged about her blog here.) It's my friend, T-L. Tammy-Lee started blogging over at What's TJ thinking?

Sept. 5, 2007 Hospitality

I've copied this from my other blog and added some comments as I re-read it.

***************************************

Where has this gone in our society today? I am really beginning to see that it is missing in many places.

Tonight we were visiting with an older couple at their farm where they have been for 45 or so years! They moved on to the property in '63 I think she said. The original house is still there, used as a shed now! (This couple is Grandma Irene and her dear husband Grandpa Ted.)

They welcomed us in - there are six of us - with open arms. We all pitched in to help prepare the meal and get it on the table. They showed us their place, told us to make ourselves at home. On the tour there were three or four motor homes - "this is our oldest daughter's, they come out on the weekends. and this one is our middle daughter and that is our youngest's" There's not enough room in the home for everyone but they each have their little home at home! I loved it! They are hospitable not only to their own family but to the families in their church.

We ate and visited. They included the children in the conversation. I was so pleased, as a homeschool mom who felt a little under the microscope, that my girls behaved and answered well. They were well mannered and for the most part didn't interrupt. But when asked a specific question about penguins (What color are they?) my eldest answered with confidence! (They are black and white and yellow and orange. Needless to say this was questioned, and my daughter was respectful in her insistence that she was correct.)

But I digress from hospitality.

After we ate we played a fast game of Scrabble, the ladies did while the men visited!

----------------------------------

Hospitality. It's something our communities need and I find lacking.

How can I help? Without stretching myself and my funds? Well, why does being hospitable have to be costly? It doesn't and I think that is something that we have to get our heads around. A cup of coffee or tea. Bread and butter. With warm conversation and laughter and children. That is all it takes. (With or without children)

So this is my plan, my proposal. Have someone over. Once a week. Just for a visit. For some company. To be a friend - a listening ear, a shoulder, a friend to laugh with. That's on the small scale. (I have people here quite a bit lately. I started to think that I'd really slacked off on this, until I thought about the last month or so. And although many of those who come are coming to give me a hand, I still try to make them comfortable and welcome.)

Another thing that's been bouncing around in my busy mind is a weekly social gathering after church on Sunday, every week, for fellowship. Bring what you would be eating for lunch anyway, we'll set it up on a table, grab some paper plates and visit and eat. Get to know each other and each other's children and spouses. Invite grandparents. Make it inter-generational. So informal. So fun. It doesn't have to be stressful. Come and go. (This is too lofty a goal for my current season of life, but . . . one day.)

When I think about the gatherings in the Bible most have a food element. (Just a thought.) So, to me it makes sense that in today's society we have food at our gatherings! And why not?

Think about hospitality more. Think about how you can integrate it into your life more. Think cheap! Think simple. Think small scale. Please comment. Give me more to think about!